Author Topic: To make you laugh...  (Read 20536 times)

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Offline Itchigo

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #30 on: April 01, 2014, 12:03:50 AM »
Kind of a rant.....

I bought a bird feeder. I hung
It on my back porch and filled
It with seed. What a beauty of
A bird feeder it was, as I filled it lovingly with seed.
Within a week we had hundreds of birds
Taking advantage of the
Continuous flow of free and
Easily accessible food.
 
But then the birds started
Building nests in the boards
Of the patio, above the table,
And next to the barbecue.
 
Then came the poop. It was
Everywhere: on the patio tile,
The chairs, the table ..
Everywhere!
 
Then some of the birds
Turned mean. They would
Dive bomb me and try to
Peck me even though I had
Fed them out of my own
Pocket.
 
And others birds were
Boisterous and loud. They
Sat on the feeder and
Squawked and screamed at
All hours of the day and night
And demanded that I fill it
When it got low on food.
 
After a while, I couldn't even
Sit on my own back porch
Anymore. So I took down the
Bird feeder and in three days
The birds were gone. I cleaned
Up their mess and took down
The many nests they had built
All over the patio.
 
Soon, the back yard was like
It used to be ..... Quiet, serene....
And no one demanding their
Rights to a free meal.
 
Now let's see......
Our government gives out
Free food, subsidized housing,
Free medical care and free
Education, and allows anyone
Born here to be an automatic
Citizen.
 
Then the illegal's came by the
Tens of thousands. Suddenly
Our taxes went up to pay for
Free services; small apartments
Are housing 5 families; you
Have to wait 6 hours to be seen
By an emergency room doctor;
Your child's second grade class is
Behind other schools because
Over half the class doesn't speak
English.
 
Corn Flakes now come in a
Bilingual box; I have to
'press one ' to hear my bank
Talk to me in English, and
People waving flags other
Than �ours� are
Squawking and screaming
In the streets, demanding
More rights and free liberties.
 
Just my opinion, but maybe
it's time for the government
To take down the bird feeder.
 
If you agree, pass it on; if not,
Just continue cleaning up the poop! [/font]
« Last Edit: April 01, 2014, 12:05:58 AM by Itchigo »
Tremble in fear! Behold my Bankai!


Offline GSGregg

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #31 on: April 01, 2014, 01:17:34 AM »
There may be an investment opportunity as demand for bigger shovels materializes.....

Hey, Tim! What's it like, finding yourself in a Hitchcock movie?

Gregg

Offline Itchigo

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The Rogue Buisness Model....
« Reply #32 on: April 03, 2014, 10:34:53 AM »
Just came across this, and I thought it was appropriate...
Tremble in fear! Behold my Bankai!


Offline Druadic

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #33 on: April 03, 2014, 11:04:56 AM »
ROFL!  That's about right there! FUNNY!  :Green:

Offline Itchigo

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #34 on: April 26, 2014, 08:50:34 PM »
How about this?
Tremble in fear! Behold my Bankai!


Offline Druadic

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #35 on: May 02, 2014, 10:42:57 PM »
How about this?

Great. Now VP is getting the "door to door" treatment.  :Cool:

Offline Itchigo

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Been there, done that...
« Reply #36 on: May 17, 2014, 04:01:24 AM »
Had this happen in Springfield IL on I-55 years ago, didn't go off into a field though.

Driver Saves Semi-Truck from Tipping over due to High Winds during Tornado Season
Tremble in fear! Behold my Bankai!


Offline GSGregg

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #37 on: May 17, 2014, 04:50:47 AM »
I'm going to tell Sister Martha that the narrators were yelling "Phooey! Phooey!"

Hens don't try to fly in that weather, and trucks shouldn't try to haul eggs!  :Hellno:  :Iagree:

Offline Rukia

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #38 on: May 18, 2014, 02:17:01 PM »
Ok guys!  This one's for you!
Rukia
Y'all behave yourselves or I'll have to smack ya's!

Offline GSGregg

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #39 on: May 18, 2014, 05:05:24 PM »
(Chuckle) No bones about it!

Offline Rukia

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #40 on: May 27, 2014, 07:15:08 AM »
And you thought it was just a harmless little bunny rabbit!
 
Rukia
Y'all behave yourselves or I'll have to smack ya's!

Offline Pintrepid

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #41 on: May 29, 2014, 01:25:16 AM »
Ooooh, nooooooo! I'm gonna have nitemares! Vampire Wabbit gonna GIT me!!!!
-PeterMac


Offline GSGregg

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #42 on: May 29, 2014, 05:45:32 AM »
Brother May-Nard! Bring up the Holy Hand Grenade! (Silly Wabbit!)

Offline faralos

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #43 on: May 30, 2014, 07:01:55 AM »
funny pic here!
I am never wrong Once I thought I was
 but I was merely mistaken

Offline Itchigo

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Re: To make you laugh...
« Reply #44 on: July 31, 2014, 08:10:54 PM »
I want one!!
Tremble in fear! Behold my Bankai!